We’re not supposed to be alone. It’s not just romantic relationships, but our general day-to-day relationships are important to humans. We need compassion, care, and conversation, and we need it regularly if we hope to feel supported and loved. When you are with a partner who supports you, you are going to feel like you’re an equal. They’ll boost you up when you’re feeling down, listen to your problems, and celebrate your wins.
However, if your partner isn’t being supportive, it can cause real problems in your relationship – and affect your mental health. You may experience feelings of loneliness, frustration, sadness, emptiness, or hopelessness. You might even begin to ask yourself what is heart failure and whether you can get it from being broken hearted. Here, we’re discussing the tell-tale signs that you’re with an unsupportive partner so that you can turn things around.
1. They’re not listening.
It’s the worst feeling in the world to be seen but feel entirely ignored, which often happens when your feelings are being minimized and brushed over. You should be heard because you matter, and if your partner isn’t listening to you, you have to try to communicate that to them. If they still won’t pay attention to the things that are important to you, you need to leave. You deserve better.
2. They’re dismissive.
The person who says that they love you should never dismiss you or wave you away. Being dismissive is similar to not listening, but it’s worse because they’ll hear you but brush you off. This isn’t something anyone should be feeling in a relationship and when you are, you have to take it as a red flag.
3. They’re not consistent.
Does your partner blow hot and cold? One minute all is well, and the next you’re walking on eggshells – sound familiar? If this is the case, you have to think about whether you can cope with that feeling forever. Most people couldn’t, and no one should. You should never have to cope with feeling as if you are an afterthought. You deserve to be a priority in their life.
4. They’re jealous of your successes.
Are you getting amazing promotions at work? Are you making friends or traveling to new places? Your partner should be proud and happy that you are able to do those things, and you should be able to celebrate when you do things well. When your partner feels disgruntled or put out by your success, that should be a sign that they’re not supportive of you.
5. They’re just not interested.
There’s a feeling of rejection that comes when you are telling someone you love all about your feelings and what you’ve been up to, and they aren’t interested. Are they showing you that they want to know all about your goals and your dreams? If they’re not, that’s another sign that they are an unsupportive partner.
6. They are the story stealers.
When you’re in the middle of a story and are telling someone about what you’ve been up to, they’re supposed to listen and ask questions. If your partner turns your story into a monologue about them, then it might be time to move on. If you’ve been to Tenerife, they don’t need to go to Elevenerife – if you catch the drift.
7. They talk over you every time.
When you are living with an unsupportive partner, you’ll notice that they’ll talk over you whenever you try to get a word in. It’s difficult when this happens, as it can make you feel like there’s no point in sharing the fun things that are happening in your life. Your voice matters, and it’s important that you then talk over them to stop them from talking over you!
8. They’re truly negative.
You should be left feeling happy and relaxed in the presence of the person you love, and yet when they are always puncturing your positive bubbles with negativity, it can feel hurtful. Unsupportive partners won’t ever make you feel like you can fly. They’ll make you feel that every good thing you could have going for you has a negative flipside. But the truth is, you really don’t have to listen to it!
9. They just don’t bother with you.
Are you the one sending all the text messages? Making all the phone calls? You should be equal here – equally wanting the best for one another, equally contacting each other. It takes nothing to send a quick text message, and you deserve to be seen and heard, not forgotten! They should be following up with you and communicating with you. It shouldn’t be a hardship to them.
The key takeaway is that you deserve to be with someone who loves you and who wants to be with you. If they do, they’ll show you.The key takeaway is that you deserve to be with someone who loves you and who wants to be with you. If they do, they’ll show you.