Unfortunately, toxic relationships are more common than you might think. Some people don’t even realize their relationship is toxic until it all comes to a head – even then, a lot of people refuse to leave their relationship because they believe they love their partner. Here, we are going to be looking at some of the things that you must understand if you are in one of these relationships.
You are better off without them.
The first thing that you need to understand is that you are better off without your partner. You will always be better off without any kind of toxicity in your life, even if it means that you lose someone that you love in the process. Heartbreak is temporary, even though it hurts badly; if you stay in a toxic relationship, your heart is going to break daily, and there is no healing until it stops.
The thing that you might not realize right now is that a toxic relationship will be breaking down your confidence, and every part of who you are. Look at it from the outside, and then ask yourself these questions:
- Have you been isolated from your friends and family members?
- Do you feel good about yourself?
- Do you feel loved all the time?
If the answers to these questions are not what you want, then you know that something is wrong, and action must be taken.
Never bring a baby into it.
You should never bring a baby into a toxic relationship. It is likely that your partner is a narcissist if you are in one of these relationships, and they might try to convince you that this is what it is going to take to make your relationship work. It’s not true. If your relationship isn’t good without a baby, it’s only going to get worse with one – babies have a way of bringing all the problems in your relationship to the surface.
You might feel as though your clock is ticking though, and if not now, are you going to be able to have a baby? While it might not be the option that you prefer, you could always get some of your eggs frozen if you are a woman, and then look at embryo grading and the IVF process down the line when you are in a healthy relationship.
It will never change.
Many people stay in toxic relationships because they believe their partner is going to change. However, this is not going to happen. It’s not going to get better, they are not going to change, and your relationship will always be toxic because they are toxic. Or, you bring out the worst in each other, and the relationship itself is what is toxic. You need to understand that things are not going to change and then leave, even though it might be the toughest thing you have ever done.
In a toxic relationship, you will typically find that you are constantly attempting to get the next milestone. You will think, “When we’re engaged it will be better,” and when it isn’t, it will be, “When we’re married, things will be better,” and this will continue on. Eventually, there are going to be no more things that could possibly make it any better, and that’s when you’re really stuck.
You are not at fault.
If the person that you are in a relationship with is toxic, it is not your fault. You often hear comments like, “I made them angry,” or, “I shouldn’t have done that.” Of course, there are times where we do things we shouldn’t do, but this shouldn’t have repercussions such as being verbally abused by your partner, or even worse. Just remember that you’re not the one at fault, and if you do decide to leave, don’t let them convince you that you are.
We hope that you have found this article helpful, and now understand a few crucial truths about toxic relationships. Ultimately, the decision is yours about whether or not you stay involved in this relationship, but you have to think about what you are benefiting from it. If the answer is anything other than your peace, it’s not worth it.